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What are you made of?

Hey! Heyy!! Heyyy!!!

Happy Monday!!! I hope you all are having a wonderful day.

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So I generally I can hear something and it helps the creative juices flow into what my next post would be about. Recently, I heard this saying, “The same water that boils the egg, softens the potato.” That rang so loud into my thoughts. At first, I paused and thought well damn ain’t that something?

Everyone has a rough time. And everyone has been in some bad circumstances, but they do not determine the outcome. They can, but you also have the power to change those circumstances. Someone can have the exact same situation you’re in, but they chose to change the outcome for the better. The circumstances may be shitty, but fighting for a better outcome can help you rise above any misfortune. Now there may be some things that are out of your control, but your attitude is what determines your altitude. A positive attitude enables you to make a difference in your world and the world around you. When you are able to see things in a positive light, you are attracting positive energy.

I live in the world of reality and I understand that life happens. There are unforeseen and unfortunate events that can happen, but sadly that’s just life. The way to handle those unforeseen circumstances or misfortunes is to ride that wave. You may wobble while on the wave, but the fact that you try means you aren’t letting the wave take you down. Some waves may be big and some may be small, but no matter how big the wave is, just know you can overcome it. It’s never about the obstacle that comes your way, it’s about how you overcome that obstacle. Any kind of hot water you’re in, remember… the same water that boils the egg, softens the potato.

This is your life. This is your moment. You were born for a reason. Now is the time to bring out the burning passion inside and show the world what you’re made of.

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What are YOU made of? What are YOU built for?

Until next time! 🙂

P.S.

Check out my YouTube channel! (Don’t forget to like & SUBSCRIBE!!!)

 

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Baby · life · Mommy Blog

Fourth Times The Charm

Hey! Heyy!! Heyyy!!!

Happy Wednesday everyone! I hope everyone had a great Easter.

The great thing about social media is that you can meet new people from different parts of the world. I have met plenty of women on Instagram who has the same motherhood struggles, same interest, etc. I reached out to my followers to see if anyone would be interested in being a guest blogger. To my surprise, I received some feedback. I have connected with some very empowering women and would love to share some of what they have to say.

I am very excited to introduce you all to my first guest blogger, Lauren Taylor! I hope you all enjoy her post!

*I have three children. I work full time, volunteer at our church, my husband is an entrepreneur, we have two dogs, my husband is a volunteer firefighter and I am a (sometimes) PTA member, and I want another baby.

How crazy is that?! I am quite possibly insane. Because I mean come on, after I listed some of my activities above; how could any person, especially a person who falls into bed at the end of each day dreaming about a two-week vacation, could possibly want to throw another tiny human into this mix?

So, let me explain myself. First, lets back up a few weeks. I sit down to write this piece about how my spring break as a working mom was with my children. Immediately all of the obvious roadblocks like returning to work and kids activities started hijacking a timely completion and I just could not get it going! My words were just not manifesting what I wanted to say. Mainly because we had a really boring, but great, spring break. We went to the zoo, did dentist appointments, played at the park with friends. There were lots of giggles and sticky kisses, but that was it. Those last couple of sentences would’ve been my entire blog. I didn’t feel that a piece like that would move anyone, heck it didn’t even move me. I needed to unpack what has been awakened in my mind since 2018 started.

OK so now let’s do some more backing up. I bring you to April 2016. Our daughter who was also our third child was a preemie about six weeks old and I was D O N E. I called my mom crying, actually more like wailing, and I just told her I couldn’t do this. This joy of motherhood had lost its luster in about a six-week time frame. I was completely overwhelmed with a six-year-old, 20-month-old, and this infant. In the middle of all of this, we had just bought our first house and were in the process of moving in. I suffered from a very intense case of post-partum anxiety, that took over my body so physically my jaw would throb from being incredibly tense. It was also at that point that my husband started talking about a fourth baby. Now before we all villainize my husband, he is an epic pregnant husband. He is so wonderful while I’m pregnant, I truly feel like he should write a book on how it’s done. To make additional money, I might think about renting him out for the first two weeks a baby is born because he truly shines. But then around the six-week mark, he’s back to regular husband mode where he says things that are so ridiculous, it baffles me that he approved that message before it passed through his lips. So, in April of 2016, he felt compelled to start petitioning me for another baby. As a result, I went into survival mode.

For almost two years, I would tell anyone who would listen that I was done having children. The sweet old ladies who commented on my little brood would be met with a sweetly awkward rebuttal of “Oh thank you so much, I am not having any more.” Trust me, I do awkward very well just ask my sister. It was like I convinced myself that it would put it out into the universe, then the reality of deep down wanting another baby would never come to light and I would be safe. But when you are running from something it is so important to know the why and reckon with it in your heart.

My reasons can be broken down into three easy sections. The first, in no particular order, is vanity. I wanted my body back. Which is a tried and true saying for many moms out there. I was able to “bounce back” after our first baby was born. I was 23 and still had all of the healthy habits of college. Plus, I only had one to look after and our second son wasn’t born for another four years. Plenty of time to stay in a size small. But having our daughter within 20 months of the second, my body has stayed squishy long than I have intended. Any size smaller than a larger at this point is laughable.

Second, is my health. I have had three C-sections already and an appendectomy during my second pregnancy, so a fourth incision isn’t ideal. My doctors have assured me that while another baby is doable, I need to definitely take a much time for my body to fully reset and potentially take some uterine lining thickening meds. I will say that this reason is the one I relied on the heaviest. Why? Because it’s the scariest one and the easiest one to use. “Why aren’t you having any more children?” “Because my doctor says that I should be done.” Most people in Target or on Facebook are not going to argue that logic with you.  I could use it as a cloaking mechanism to hid behind. Could a fourth pregnancy be risky? Yes. Has my doctor said that it is completely out of the question? No.

My last category is the worry. I am a classic worry wart. When I was younger my dad would give me books on overcoming fear because it was very difficult for me. I was lead by what people thought about me and if I would fail. And in this looming fourth baby situation, it’s no different. I worry what society is going to think of me. Four kids like an astronomical amount nowadays. I mean its basically a zany TLC reality show waiting to happen. I worry about what my family is going to think of me. I worry how money is going to work out. I worry about what shopping will look like with a fourth baby mom body. I worry if I’ll have enough love to spread. I worry what my employer will think about me. Basically, worry, worry, worry. There are some days that are better than others when it comes to this. And I will tell you that lots of prayer, honest communication with my husband and therapist help me stay in a place where worry doesn’t drown me.

Now enough of living in the past let’s jump to the present-ish. January 2018, we had just come off of an epic holiday season as a family. We do not live close to any relatives so from October 31st – January 1st we really embrace and embellish the season for our kids as our own tradition. I had taken a good amount of time off of work to be with my family and just soak up all of the loving energy they give off. I was getting ready for us to get back to our normal routine and going through the house frantically trying to clean up when I noticed a different sense come over me. It was like my mind’s eye or my soul started looking for my fourth child. I just saw our three crazies running around and half expected for another one to be teetering after them. I brushed aside the feeling chalking it up it to the residuals thoughts that linger from being on Facebook too long and seeing everyone’s life play out through filtered pictures. But then the baby dreams started. Followed by this constant feeling of the milk letdown when you’re nursing. Seeing our daughter playing mama and being obsessed with babies is softening my heart to know that she’ll be okay giving up the baby spot. Our seven-year-old’s teacher sent me an email, out of the blue, telling me she had a dream the night before that I was pregnant with another baby girl. These waves of emotions brought to life a seed I thought I had done a stellar job of burying. But that’s the funny thing about seeds, you never know when they will begin to sprout roots and grow.

I have no idea what the future holds. I know that I am completely open to welcoming a beautiful little seedling into our home. I know I am more honest with myself about what I want truly want out of life. I mean I just want another baby, what is so wrong with that? I also know that I don’t want to wrap my story up with a cheesy don’t listen to others but do whatever makes you feel happy line. What I will say is learn yourself and don’t shortchange yourself on what you want out of life; whether it be baby one, two, five or six. Go in grace and your outcome will be beautiful.

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God Built Me To Last💗

Hey guys! So I have really been going through it in life lately. I swear I feel like I just can’t get ahead. I try and let go of each day when I lay my head down at night and start the next day with a blank canvas. Lately, I feel as though my canvas isn’t blank at all. There is something that lingers or bleeds through into the next day. Being the positive person I am, I try to not let that affect my days. I’m not going to lie, it’s tough to not let that become a lingering issue. But somehow I figure out a way to let it go.

When I’m feeling down or sad about anything, one thing I do I is pray. I’ve been praying a lot more lately because of the way life has been hitting me. Prayer for me is my way to connect with God and understand why I am where I am. He has the ultimate plan and I just have to sit back and let him do his work.

“If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.”

With all that is going on in my life, I can see how people give up. I can understand how when people hit rock bottom they don’t make the best of choices. Even though I’m getting through these bad or tough days, praying is what brings me out of the darkness into the light. It is easy to give up and not care what happens next. I refuse to give up on me. I have worked too hard to give up now. Sometimes I doubt myself, but the prayers that I pray reassure me that I am doing exactly what I need to do. I am exactly where I am supposed to be in life. I know that because God built me to last!

“There is no testimony without a TEST”

Always remember that God will never put you through anything you can’t handle.

Get your “God Built Me To Last” t-shirt now!

life · Mommy Blog

Overcoming Bad Days

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase. – Martin Luther King

I know I’m not alone when it comes to bad days. And boy did I have a BAD day this week. This day was so bad to the point I honestly thought I wasn’t going to make it. It seemed like the domino effect was almost endless for me.

I don’t have a very good way of dealing with chaos and stress. Not having an effective plan to deal with anxiety and stress causes me to just break down. I break down to the point where I physically make myself sick. I don’t like it. I feel helpless and I also feel defeated. One thing is inevitable. I can’t control life. What I can control is how I decide to handle the curve balls that life throws at me.

When life hits me hard, I will hit back harder. With all that said I obviously am here writing this blog. Which means I made it through that rough day. I know it won’t be my last rough or bad day but I know that no matter how hard those days can be I know I can make it. A snowball doesn’t have to turn into an avalanche. We all have those days. Some more than others, but just know that one way or another, you will make it. Just don’t give up.

Here is some advice is to overcome those bad days…

Step 1: Take a deep breath.

Step 2: Assess all the bad things going wrong.

Step 3: Change what you can.

Step 4: Roll with the punches.

Step 5: Accept that today just may not be your day.

Pain is evitable. Suffering is optional. – M. Kathleen Casey

Thanks for reading! Until next time!

XOXO,

Donna B 

P.S. head over and check out my YouTube channel and don’t forget to subscribe!

Baby · life · Mommy Blog

Balance

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Have you ever felt like you have just been off? Like life is just going the opposite way of traffic. I have had this feeling for a while now. I had it set in my mind at a young age that I was going to have it all. Married with kids. Owning my own home. A business degree and my own startup company. Be a soccer mom. Be that supermom, Etc. That mindset I had was quickly brought back to reality real quick as I started taking the time to reflect on my life.

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Recently I have been feeling like what is going on with my life. Why do I feel the way I feel? Why have I lost my aspirations in life? Then the lightbulb set off! BALANCE! My life is so off balance. I need to level it out. There is an uneven distribution of weight that is enabling my life to be thrown off. I am not in the upright position.

The first step to solving an issue is to assess the damage/ problem. My problem seems to be time and motivation. I have been lacking the time management skills I know I have to keep that part of my life balanced. I have been missing the motivation to go the extra mile. I am deciding to change that TODAY. I have two little humans that I need to set great examples for. My children are a reflection of me and what I teach them. I know if I was complacent with being lazy, I would hate myself later in life because I gave them those traits and attributes.

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I would like to live a well-balanced life with my; health, family, financial, intellectual, social, work, spiritual, recreation, personal growth, romance and so much more. In order to have this balance, here is what I am doing to help find my balance. 🙂

  1. Focus on your priorities.
  2. Get organized. 
  3. Be flexible. 
  4. Create daily routines.
  5. Establish support networks. 
  6. Simplify your life. 

Finally, I thought can I do this? Can I have it all? The answer is ABSOLUTELY. Why wouldn’t I be able to? Finding the balance is not only important for me, but for my family as well to be successful. There will be times when I may feel like my world is out of control and I can’t do anything but ride that wave and fix the damage as I go.

Thanks for reading! Until next time!

XOXO,

Donna B 🌺

P.S. head over and check out my YouTube channel! 🙂

 

 

 

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Just DO It!

Hey! Heyy! Heyyy!

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I hope you’re having a fantastic day! So I always struggle with coming up with my next blog idea. I can write and write and it will just sound like blah blah blah in my head. Whenever I get the urge to write, I take advantage of it, because I don’t want that energy to go to waste.

I recently came up with the idea to expand and start a YouTube Channel. I had thought about it for so long, but never acted on it. Until one day. I set up a backdrop in my bathroom and set up my phone and hit record. Once I was done I realized why I never started a YouTube Channel before. Looking back at the footage, I looked like a deer in headlights. I didn’t sound like myself. Although I was watching myself, that person in the video was not ME. I wasn’t happy with that video, so I decided to try again. And again. And again. And again and again and again. I realized that I was waiting for the perfect video. But little did I know. I was never going to get the perfect video. So as fearlessly as possible, I set up the background and camera again and just did it. I successfully filmed my first post worthy YouTube video.

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The next step was posting it. While that took A LOT of courage, I dug a little deeper and I posted it. And then informed close family and friends for some moral support. I did it! I thought the hardest part was filming and posting, I forgot what other people would have to say about me on camera or on my channel. A few days after posting my intro video, I would check here and there to see if I had gained any subscribers, likes, comments, etc. I woke up one morning and saw a few new comments. Before seeing them I was a little excited to see what people thought. Little did I know, there was nothing to be excited about. There were a few random hurtful & evil comments made just on my intro video. There were comments about me and my kids. Reading those comments, I was speechless. I thought to myself, “well damn was my video that bad?” “Was the quality horrible?” I then immediately changed my thoughts. These people don’t know me. They have no clue how much of an amazing mom and person I am. I decided right then and there I am not going to feed the negativity that can and will come with starting my channel. People are so entitled to their opinions. I will NOT let them make or break me. Their opinions of my life have no relevance to me and how successful I am and will be!

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I learned a very valuable lesson from this. People will always have something to say about the way you live YOUR life, but their opinions don’t pay you a salary, make you happy, feed you, or bring you joy, so DO NOT LET THEM BRING YOU DOWN. I will continue to make videos for my channel and if people like it they like it and if they don’t, they don’t and I am fine with that.

Check out my first YouTube video. Like, comment, subscribe!

 

Thanks for reading! And until next time. 🙂

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To Be Continued…

Hey! Heyy! Heyyy! Happy New Year!
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Is it just me or did 2017 just fly by? I mean I swear I was in April two days ago. Ok maybe not two days ago, but you know but you know what I mean. With a new year here, it brings new goals and aspirations. A new year also has people saying, “New year new me”. I honestly wish people would stop saying that.
As I was scrolling through my Instagram feed, I came across a friend’s caption, “There is no “New You”… just a continuation of all the good, the bad, and the ugly.” Which is absolutely the TRUTH! Going from December 31st to January 1st does not rebirth you into a new person, it’s just a transition from one year to the next. Whether 2017 was a great year or bad year for you, that doesn’t mean you just erase those good or bad things from the past. That’s just what they are…. the past.
Of course, I would love to have a good day every day, but I know that’s not my reality. I am starting to cherish those bad days and understand that those days are what makes me… me. They teach me so many life lessons on how I can better my life and not make the same mistakes over and over again. I can’t ever get a redo on a day, so I refuse to dwell on the things I can’t change.

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I am thankful for my family and support system because without them I don’t know where I’d be. For 2018, I am ready for all that God has in store for me. The good. The bad. The ugly. The unthinkable. So with that said, I am going to…. Set Goals. Achieve them. Smile more. Laugh more. Enjoy the little things. Learn more. Pray more. Love more. Meditate. Reflect. Do what makes me happy. Travel. Not limit myself. But most important, BE HAPPY.
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I pray that those who read this continue to live your best life and embrace what life throws at you.
Thanks for reading! And until next time. 😘